Dear God

I need answers, real answers!

Not like I don't get answers from you when I need them, but there is always this lingering voice in my head that there is more. 

And it goes like this, Dare, there is more. There is more grounds to cover, and there are new things to launch. 

God, you know there is only one me. All these scientific discoveries haven't given us a way to clone ourselves yet. Or have a robot that can actually have a copy of our brain and be able to do everything we want done when we can't do it ourselves.

I know I am trying, these days I spend a lot of time talking to people, training them on new work skills especially around all these agile thing going around these days. Some of the people I have trained or coached are getting great roles as Scrum Masters, Business Analysts, Product Managers and more. 

But there is more side in me screaming for attention. That endless yearning to unleash the design related stuff like Service Design and Business Design efforts. Yes, I'm embedding these into my work in Agile Coaching already, but I really want to do more.

And the one that is almost crying the loudest is a yearning to become a VC. I'm just wondering, perhaps keep working hard make enough money to write more checks beyond the little ones I write infrequently today. It feels like this is what I should be focused on. And what makes it more compelling is the opportunity to coach more startup founders in addition to providing them capital. 

God, I hope you are still listening. I want to do it, I want to die empty. I know I still have many more years to go. And there is time to be more and do more.

But these things sound like I should be doing them today, like right now. 

I keep taking baby steps by the day in the right direction. And I'm learning patience without quenching my yearning and zeal. 

This is my prayer that you help me. Please really help me. And sometimes maybe just a confirmation of when the time will be ripe to get into some of these things. So I don't stress myself thinking I'm missing out on what I should be doing now. 

Also, please do help me to be more consistent. I know I work hard, but I can be smarter with my time. I know for a fact that there is more! 

And I know without fail, that my life will continually align with your leading per time. Thank you Lord for listen to me pour my heart out. Now I will go make some of request to you in prayers in addition to the ones made here. 

I love you Lord, and I know you do too.